Archive for the ‘Mailers’ Category
The Newbergundians
For the intrepid traveler heading from Portland to the Pacific coast, Newberg is a must stop (due mostly to the stoplights, all illogically timed). The alert driver is able to use his confinement at […]
Ask Dr. Cameron
Q: Even though it isn’t real news, I sometimes watch Sixty Minutes on television. They were recently talking about two French doctors who said that drinking red wine actually reduces heart attacks (I think the […]
An Olfactory Affair
London- In rare display of public disclosure, Lady Di admitted that she had found a Pinot that smelled better than that which her husband continually presented to her: “It’s a little funky but it brings […]
Hatcher Emerges from Chapter 11
Wm. Hatcher emerged today seemingly unaffected by the latest chapter in Dundee Hills Assigned Reading. Local feminists were not amused by his assertion that, in fact, men are from Mars but women are from Cleveland. […]
A Tail of a Whale
The Far Side Comes to Life in Oregon
After a 45-foot, eight-ton dead whale washed up on an Oregon beach, the Oregon State Highway Department was assigned responsibility for getting rid of it. Whales and […]
Rushgate! Winemaker Predicting Astronomic Demand for Pinot Noir
Cameron Winery Pinot futures again soared to their limits on the spot market as reports surfaced concerning columnist Rush Limabugh’s ill-fated midnight love tryst late Tuesday. While security cameras rolled, Limbaugh was seen in Fermenter […]
Nuclear shelter: “It’s only Code”
Alert Bung staff members have uncovered a daring project at Cameron Winery. Under the cover of building “just a cave to store some of our wine,” it appears that the owners of Cameron Winery are […]
Favoritism Denied
Suspect winemaker claims proboscis coloration is due to solar exposure.
In a typical burst of candor yesterday, Oregon winemaker John Paul denied allegations that blotched skin color on his nose was in any way related […]
Gentlemen, Butter Your Chafing Dishes!
The Oregon State Highway Department has announced an open competition to select seven chefs for its Fall Possum Promotion. The kickoff dinner titled, appropriately, It’s Probably Possum! is scheduled for later in the season once […]
Prehistoric Speedwalker Discovered
Scientists at Cameron Community College have unearthed what they describe as “one of the most significant discoveries of early hominid fossils by untenured professors.” The nearly complete skeleton was discovered by utility workers in suburban […]
